I just got home from an informative event, which I had organized or helped organized (because the concept, speakers etc. were already all planned before). It all went well, I think. At least it ran smoothly, the audience was getting all the information they needed or wanted to know.
Instead of being content with the fact that it all went well and without a glitch or failure from anyone involved though, I’m beating myself up over something that might not even be an issue. But which in my mind I already have built up to be an issue. Without getting into too many details…
The owners of two of the 15-20 small firms we cooperate with in the field, which we were informing about tonight, let me know in advance that they would attend the meeting as well. I forgot to tell my division manager who gave a short speech at the beginning and moderated the event.
If he had known about their attendance he might have mentioned them and thanked them for coming. I’m not even sure if those two guys actually even came tonight, as they didn’t walk up to me or to the division manager (who I think they must have met before and thus know) to tell us they were there or to introduce themselves. I have no idea if they would have expected to be mentioned/introduced, if they had indeed been in attendance. I have no idea if they are now pissed at me/us that they have been ignored.
So, rational recap: I have no idea if they were there and what they expected and how they reacted to what they did or did not expect. But…. I’m freaking myself out over the mere possibility that they maybe have been offended by not being mentioned. The judgemental, self-depreciating bitch inside my head hasn’t stopped nagging me about it and has painted the negative aftermath (getting angry phonecalls + complaints, being reprimanded etc.) in cinematic scope while I was driving home.
Maybe having written this blog post, will help her to just STFU :-)