I have many more questions I’m trying to answer at the moment. Some are important, some mundane and some rather insignificant, but I thought writing about those could be a good way trying to get back into the blogging mood and to post more often and not just when I’ve watched a new episode of Grey’s Anatomy :-) Which is already the cue for the first question.
[Just to be clear, I’m not really expecting you, who are reading this , to answer the questions for me, but suggestions and comments are always welcome. Especially for the 3rd question, answers are basically essential *g*.]
#1: What will I vent about once the Grey’s musical episode has aired in a few hours?
If you follow me on twitter you will by now have read dozens of tweets in which I complain about this musical idea on my favourite show. I wrote a blog post about it a few weeks ago and my opinion hasn’t changed. At all. The more I think about it though, I realize that maybe I’m using this stupid, stupid idea of a musical episode as a way to just vent in general. To have something I can direct my negative thoughts and emotions towards. Like hitting a punching bag instead of a real person, if you know what I mean.
The thing is: I couldn’t really say what is causing this underlying stressed, negative, overwhelmed state of my mind, even if I tried. It’s nothing special but maybe lots of tiny things that are nagging me and which make me to lose sleep over. As I can’t make out the source of this weird “My life sucks” mood yet, I have no solid issue to bitch about. So I direct my bitchiness towards this Grey’s musical.
I know I’m probably making too much fuss about it and I might be tearing it apart much more than it deserves. It might not be that bad after all. But I expect it to be, hey, I even want it to be by now, because then it would at least would have served the purpose to provide an outlet for my frustration and anger which was caused by totally unrelated other stuff. Does that make sense to anyone? Maybe not… Anyway. It feels good to be able to bitch about something, even if it is just this next episode of Grey’s Anatomy. Stress relief and all. The question remains: what will I use as outlet to vent about in the near future ;-)?
#2: Why do I sometimes turn into a nervous wreck about stuff that doesn’t really matter?
The underlying “my life sucks” mood might have been one reason why I’m susceptible to unnecessary anxiety about insignificant details at the moment. I’ve always been someone who worries too much and worries about the most stupid things. I guess low self-esteem does that you. Anyway, I haven’t had one of those really bad moments in a while. Moments of feeling nauseous and losing sleep about something that seems so insignificant in retrospective.
I can’t even explain what it was all about, because it was… stupid. But I was a nervous wreck for a few days. And I hated it. I knew what caused this feeling and I could have dealt with the whole issue a lot earlier if the anxiety about all the worst case scenarios wouldn’t have paralyzed me for a while. Of course the whole issue I was worried about was not an issue at all. And of course by now I’m already starting to worry that there might be another troublesome issue vaguely related to that non-issue.
Yes, I know this is borderline paranoid. The low self-esteem side of my psyche refused to agree yet though. I guess I’ll just have to wait it out… The good thing is, that I know from past experiences that it always works out fine in the end. No matter what kind of disasters I expect the disaster never ever occurs. So I should just stop worrying so much. Unfortunately that’s easier said than done…
Enough with all the psychoanalyzing babbling now. The last question for the day is one I wanted to ask on twitter for days now, but it’s difficult to explain in 140 characters why I’m asking it *g*
#3: Buying and eating icecream in public: Cone or cup :-)?
There is no right or wrong answer to that, I think, because to each their own. But I was wondering about that ever since there have been more sunny days and there were more people out on the streets eating icecream.
How do you buy your icecream if you’re taking it with you and not sitting down in the icecream parlour to devour it? I usually buy it in a cup, because eating one or two large scopes of icecream in a cone is just such a messy business, isn’t it? Especially when you’re strolling down the shopping streets or whereever. I was watching those people licking the melting icecream off their cones and just thought: “I’m glad I’ll never been seen doing that” ;-) Maybe I’m just to clumsy to master the art of eating icecreams in cones, but I very much prefer the easy going spooing it up from a cup. What about you?