I used the time on the train on my way to work and back to read parts of a textbook and also parts of what I wrote for my term paper. Around 4.10 PM a realization hit me. I still haven’t understood some of this course’s content. In at least one part of the paper I got way off track from the correct line of argument. So so way off track. And I had no idea how to get back on track and furthermore get a hang of the contents which I still haven’t understood yet. After a couple of minutes, some pondering and a look at the examination regulations I decided to not hand in the paper and thus flunk this exam. I feel a bit bad about it and mostly I’m mad at myself that I let it get this far, by starting to work on this paper much too late. But I didn’t want to pass this with an only “sufficient” grade and I wouldn’t have been able to do more than sufficient.
This all means I will have to repeat the exam (get a new assignment and write the paper within a year after failing this first one). The course content have changed during the last year which means I now might get assignments which I will be able to understand :-) It also means I have to pay an extra 100 EUR fee for doing this assignment again. And it also means that I might have to change the course schedule I drew up for myself. But it might also means that I can be a bit more relaxed and maybe don’t have so much troubles falling asleep at night. I slept rather badly during the last couple of nights and I’m sure worrying about this paper and all that stuff might have been the reason for that. Because the lack of sleep couldn’t have been caused by nightly hockey games, which I haven’t watched for a while now :-)
Of course I still have to check with my school and program staff, if flunking and repeating this assignment really is a possible option. I gather it is, but I’d better make sure. If it isn’t, expect a very panicky post the day after tomorrow.
Talking about flunking: Team Germany lost against France at the hockey world championship and now has to play in the relegation round. Against France! Oh, this is so so bad. And embarrasing and just sad. I was only able to watch the last period and have to admit that France was the better team. France!
I hope (but actually am sure) to see some much better hockey tonight in game 7 of the Caps vs. Rangers. Yes, I probably will watch parts of the second or maybe just third period later tonight. I just can’t help it, it’s so so much fun to watch. I will have to work till the evening tomorrow, so I can head into work a bit later than usual. (I will always find something to justify watching hockey in the middle of the night).